After the first week of working very long days in a new job, I came home tonight feeling as though I wanted to do nothing but veg out, read and sleep. I was so tired from a long week. I didn’t want to write. I didn’t want to produce anything. These are all really good reasons for not doing something, right? But who am I coming up with these reasons for? Who am I bargaining with? Who am I making my excuses to?
Back when I was in college, I usually put off work as long as possible until a deadline. I couldn’t find the value in what I was doing and I never really saw the point. The norm was to put off ‘what I was supposed to do’ for as long as possible.
In Praxis, it is no longer about what I’m supposed to do. I’m focused on my own goals–what I want to work towards and what I want to accomplish. During college, I may have put off deadlines or ‘procrastinated’ on what I was supposed to do. Yet in Praxis, every PDP or goal I work towards achieving is something I picked for myself. I designed my own goals and because I chose them, I no longer procrastinate.
I’m doing this for me. I’m not placing my hopes and future into some external institution or idea. I’m choosing myself and I’m utilizing everything Praxis has to offer to help get me there. I’m investing in myself. I’m working towards my own goals and they are defined by no one but me.